Mar 02, 2020
I have been feeling like shit about being so distracted from my coaching business over the last few weeks.
We moved a few weeks ago and at first that was the circumstance I thought was keeping me from working on the business. Throw in some days of feeling icky and one week turns to two. Then design business took a boost, and remains boosted. Which is great!
But because I think these things have distracted me from coaching business, I not only use it against myself to not work on the business, but also I blame these blessings for my results in the coaching business. Using these things as an excuse against myself makes them way less fun to enjoy. And thinking I should be further along with my coaching business than I am today, has left me feeling defeated and guilty.
Anyone else have a soap opera in their heads?! 🤦🏼♀️
So enter the epiphany! “Should” is the core problem here. It’s not our fab new home, not some downtime with a cold, and new design projects. The problem is this idea I believed that where I am today with the coaching business isn’t good enough... or "right", or anything but what it is. That the inaction and inactivity is a going to cause some sort of awful, unrecoverable, career-ending failure. No. Inaction towards the biz leads to no activity in the biz. Period.
Assessing current results, planning and acting towards changing them is much more helpful.
I can do things differently, but throwing in the “should” adds gobs of unnecessary and really unhelpful regret and guilt that weigh me down. It keeps mentally me going back to regret not being in an idyllic place that doesn't exist. It has me spinning out in "should shame."
Thinking we should be somewhere different than where we are in actual 3D reality, in this very moment, is a trap that holds you in misery. Keeping “should thoughts” around to bitch slap ourselves in the face with, is only going to make any current dissatisfaction much worse.
Until you move away from the should, it will keep you stuck. Sluggish. Drained. Perpetually disappointed with yourself and in the people around you.
If you need help with this in your own life, I am taking one on one clients, and I can help you untangle your mental soap opera and start creating the results you want. Click here to schedule your complimentarily mini-session today!